This is a collaboration with Ernesto Pujol's sculptures and my body in photographic images. These images present a narrative of a trans, queer, nurturing, masculine identity that can exist by using uninhibited imagination and simple gestures. All of the images show a body in relation to a table covered with playful ceramic sculptures of different colors. They exist in a secret room where the sun shines in. They are vulnerable in their nudity, but it is a safe space for all. This adult pictured never had a boyhood and these “packages” never grew up. They are like the rambunctious boys of Lord of the Flies. They survived catastrophe, having had the symbols of masculinity separated from their bodies. The separation was psychological, perhaps enforced by an enemy. The adult in the pictures had a long Peter Pan phase, but eventually experienced a strong desire to grow into manhood. He flourished while enduring a painful transformation process that left scars on his body—and heart. Now, he is the caretaker of these eternal boys. The boys are gentle and curious, like chicks that never grew up. But once they are in contact with his flesh, they mature. The childhood sculptures transform into adult genitals within the context of the adult body. Even as they conceal, they also complete the socially-acceptable notion of a masculine body. When this adult puts his clothing back on and leaves the secret room, no one thinks to ask him if he is complete. His performance of masculinity is perfect. He is a man.
Ernesto Pujol's Sculptures, "Intimate Parts," 1999, ceramic, various sizes.